People say something, we hear something else. People mean something, we comprehend something else. Always reading between the lines. Always looking for the hidden meaning. Always looking for the ulterior motive. We hear things that people didn't say, and don't hear stuff that was loud and clear. It it the circumstances that have moulded us to be wary of people's intentions or something else?
Children trust everyone who is good to them. As an adult can you afford to be like them? Can you afford to trust and be let down. Deceived? Cheated? Once bitten twice shy. No two people are alike, no two circumstances the same. How do you differentiate between the fake and the genuine? Time did you say? Maybe.
Generalization, profiling, judging become a way of our lives. Lessons we make note of, so that it doesn't happen again. But how fair is it to people at the receiving end? Can all people be bad because one like them was? Is no one trust worthy because one betrayed? Of course we "know" that prejudice isn't good but somehow we don't apply that sense in our day to day dealings and encounters. Why is there fear at the back of the mind ? Why the "What ifs" always?
We've conditioned ourselves to believe that people cannot be good without a reason. Why! Why can't they? Exceptions exist, but why are they so few and far in between. The so called "exceptions to the rule".
So many questions, such few answers. The quest continues and the day goes by.
9 people were gracious enough to leave comments:
Being cautious and careful is a good thing, but to be suspicious of, to analyze every situation with a negative attitude, to expect the worse...would cause one to attract others of the same outlook...which is sad.
I know you're not of this nature Stillness and only bringing up a dicussion...Wish all could think positive and trust in themselves and others as well.
Changing the subject...I just had a naturalist friend ID a plant I found on the property...turns out to be a native plant from "India" It's Velvetweed, sometimes called Butterprint, because it's decorative seed pot was pressed into homemade butter. Made me think of you!
Enjoy your day Stillness,
Wanda
hey...
u got me thinking... i knw wat u mean..but u knw nevr stop trusting.. cos at times its our lack of faith that makes us face a lot of flak...
being fearless n trusting despite the odds..its a BIG lesson which we learn frm repeated encounters with the world... but imp lesons nontheless.....
its like on a signal shud u give alms or not.... an old woman .. a crippled child... ur mind will say hey they run a racket..these buggers r rich .. but somewhere u wana give smthng ... maybe a chocolate to a beggar boy or a meal money to the woman.... so i say trust ur voice within... n be fearless
WANDA: Precisely my point Wanda! (By the way I really liked your views on this, and would implement them always!) Everyone must be looked at, evaluated and judged fairly. Without any events from the past involving that person or someone from his community coloring the judgment.
Certain events in my country made me think about this and I realized how unfair we are to people at times by being overly cautious, bordering on the insensitive and biased. Ofcourse it has our own good interests in mind, but not everyone is as bad as someone else. And to judge them on the basis of their caste, creed, religion felt wrong to me.
I didn't know Velvetweed was native to India, but now that I look at the pictures, I realize that, that was the first flower I learnt to draw :) So kind of you to have remembered me :D Loads of love to you Wanda!
NUPS: I totally agree with you. You cannot afford to stop trusting just because one incident was bitter. Every individual is different and every situation new. Generalization ain't good. But yea the voice within never fails you. It speaks very softly but will always tell you whether you can trust or you should stay away. Making decisions becomes a little scary at times, but that's when the voice within comes in to help. And above all you have to trust yourself. If you can't trust yourself, there is no way you can trust strangers.
Thanks Nups for adding SO much value to my post :) Really appreciated your views !
Well Miss Tranquility I will try this again! My comment went poof!
I think that having faith in mankind is one of the most difficult things for us to practice. But I also think it is one of the most important things for us to practice.
We have to just keep on trying!
Love Di
DIANA: So very well summed up Diana. Can't agree with you more on this :)
You see? This is why I tell ppl to enhance their communication skills (take courses ;)), then there won't be any problem at all! Whatever will be said will be well comprehended and vice versa :p
On a more introspective note (if that is what I can call it here), there is s'thing I feel very, very strongly. Why should anyone judge any other person for that matter? I don't think anyone has the right. There is always a reason for each of our actions’ and I do believe that each one of us has something good in us, s'times circumstances harden the exterior and one has to just be patient. As for one being wary, no one can answer that but for the person who is and the reason could be plenty until unless it isn’t at the extent of paranoia. All I can say is most often than not, kindness begets kindness and when it doesn’t you’re sad for s’time but the most beautiful thing is that one just does not give up on mankind – we’re full of surprises :)
I’ve no idea where I’m going now…
SPARKLING: Your sense of humor rocks! Have anyone every told you that ?:D
You've put forward SUCH a strong argument that you've left me with nothing to add! It brings to my mind something I read about this...Others judge us on the same parameters we judge them on..Ultimately it comes back to us..the appreciation, the brickbats..I don't know if it's making any sense to you!
Oh Stillness, I have missed so many of your post, know wonder you were wondering about me.
Never stop trusting and never start judging my friend.
Always seek answers and strive to do and be the change you want to see in others......:-) Hugs
BERNIE: Wise words Bernie! I shall ALWAYS keep them in mind!
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